


Christmas With Sherlock

by Sarah_WatsonHolmes



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-24
Updated: 2013-12-24
Packaged: 2018-01-05 22:52:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1099524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarah_WatsonHolmes/pseuds/Sarah_WatsonHolmes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock's been back for just over a month and 221B aren't celebrating Christmas as John has now lost all emotion. But Sherlock tries to change that, maybe Christmas won't be so bad after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas With Sherlock

Uploaded 8:35pm 25th December.  
‘Sherlock Holmes has been back for one month, two weeks, three hours and twenty one minutes. I would put seconds but even Sherlock thinks it is pointless because seconds pass as I write this, however I still count them. It’s good to have the consulting detective back in the streets of London, more to that he came back because they were in bad shape. We just solved our first major case together since he came back to work for Scotland Yard, it’s about time he did, working with Donavan and Anderson might have been the end of me, as Einstein once said ‘genius has its limits stupidity doesn’t’, those two make that statement so bloody true it’s almost unbelievable, I could go on and on about how bad those two are but right now I’m going to focus on the good things. Sherlock Holmes is back, he’s alive. I’d never thought I would say those words on here. The case we were on together, this time, it actually seemed liked I helped. I’ll probably write it up tomorrow. Right now, I’d rather enjoy his company before he disappears again.’

Comments

8:40 pm. Harry Watson-‘Hey lil’ brother, it’s good to see you on here again, I had a thought you might have done something stupid…again. It’s good to know he’s back to keep you in check. Also, Merry Christmas!’

8:45pm. Greg Lestrade- ‘Finally a blog update. I can still remember you almost punching him when you saw him, something he probably deserves for how he made you feel mate.’

8:47pm. Molly Hooper-‘I’m glad he’s finally seen you John, you have no idea how many times he spoke about wanting to see you again. I’m sorry I kept it a secret for so long. I know how hard you’ve had it and believe me when I told Sherlock about certain ‘ actions’ you did, he wasn’t happy, I’m glad he’s back in peoples lives, especially yours to keep you in check.’

8:48pm. John Watson- ‘Molly I survived without him so I don’t need him to ‘keep me in check’ he should have just stayed out of my life, things were better that way.’

8:49pm. Anonymous- ‘I highly doubt that john,’

John sighed closing his laptop. He knew Sherlock had just message him, the anonymous was proof enough, but the way he just stopped playing his violin and then continued a few minutes after sealed his suspicions. He knew Sherlock would never say something like that to his face, he wasn’t that type of person, in fact they hadn’t spoken about his ‘death’ since he came back, which john was silently grateful for. But he hadn’t given an explanation. The amount of times the memory went through his head over and over again, it still made no sense, not even to today. Yes Moriarty was there, but Moriarty had shot himself, why did Sherlock jump? John stood up and left his bedroom only the remember, Sherlock was playing that God forsaken violin, during his ‘absence’ John had learnt to block out annoying sounds and the violin was defiantly annoying. He made his way to the kitchen and opened up a cabinet to see various bottles of tablets. Antidepressants, paracetamol, multivitamins and a few other ones John never knew existed until now. He sighed again as he looked to the many tablets in his hand, this is what his life had succumb to, tablets. He laughed at the thought of how meaningless his life was now, no would care if he just left this God forsaken world right now.

Sherlock stopped playing and lowered his violin and looked to the army doctor, now a fully-fledged detective, but he didn’t look like much. Sherlock clearly saw he had lost weight, a lot of it, maybe three stone minimum. The bags under his eyes showed he got little sleep, but the small needle he found in the bin was even more worrying. Yes he’d found it when he came back to the flat but he knew John, being a doctor, the risks of drugs would deter any qualified doctor. But Sherlock use to taken them himself , so he knew the signs no matter how well John tried to hide them. However, John had improved over the month. His limp went away about two weeks ago, he’d put on a few pounds but he still looked weak and fragile, the same could not be said for his mind though. Strong minded and doesn’t want to back down, still the perfect solider by heart. He turned back round and faced the window. It was snowing lightly, the ground was dry and cold, perfect conditions for the snow to settle.  
“It’s snowing john,” Sherlock said slightly awkwardly, they hadn’t had a ‘normal’ conversation since they had been back, more one liners really. John walked up next to Sherlock, looking out of the window.  
“Well it’s going to be a white Christmas this year,” they both stood there in silence, watching the pavement slowly disappear. “Well at least we’ll get some sort of break from the crime and then come Christmas day, we’ll be busy,” there was hardly any enthusiasm in Johns voice, like he’d given up in life. The snow had started to settle as the fall became heavier. They needed to do something, Sherlock felt so distant from John now, he’d even questioned himself whether he had come back to the same man or not, his fall was supposed to save John but he was withering away right in front of him ‘ Was this Moriarty’s true goal? To make me completely alone?’ He just wanted the doctor to get better.  
“We’re going out,” Sherlock finally said.  
“What? No, I’m not going out there it’s too…cold,”  
“Well done great deduction, it’s Christmas and it’s snowing, come on John,”  
“A. You don’t care for snow and Christmas and B. my answer still stands as no,” Sherlock rolled his eyes, put the violin down and grabbed his coat and scarf.  
“Come on,”  
“No Sherlock!” Sherlock sighed.  
“John don’t be like this please,”  
“Like what?”  
“An idiot quite plainly,”  
“You can talk,”  
“Excuse me?”  
“You were dead for two years. Two! Fucking! Years! Everyone thought you were dead. I thought you were dead! Except Molly, you obviously trust her rather than the rest of us! Why the hell did you come back!? You and molly are obviously the new team now, go back to her house and leave. Me. Alone!”  
John was filled with pure anger and hatred. Sherlock wanted his friend back, yes he only let Molly know he was alive because she was in on it. He understood why John was so angry, he had every right to be. John was one of the last people to know Sherlock was alive. Even Lestrade and Mrs Hudson knew before him. Sherlock sighed, this outburst was a little over the top in his eyes, he grabbed Johns jacket holding it out to him.  
“We’ll talk outside. I’ll explain everything,”  
“Everything being ‘I fell to save you’ because that’s all you’ll say, that’s all you have ever said since you’ve been back,”  
“John, trust me. Please. You always have before,”  
“Yeah before you died,” Sherlock started to lose his patience a little.  
“John… please...” he needed to stay calm, for both of their sakes. John stared at Sherlock for a while before looking to his jacket and grabbing it, putting it on,”  
“You don’t normally say please,”  
“Things change John,”  
“Yeah don’t I know it,”  
“Firstly stop being so sarcastic, it’s making you look extremely stupid,”  
“Noted,”  
Sherlock sighed again, this was going to be a lot more difficult than he originally thought. But, he wasn’t going to give up. He left the room going down the stairs, john followed silently behind him.  
“Why can’t we talk indoors?”  
“Because it’s snowing. I haven’t seen the snow fall and been able to stand outside in it for the past three years,” Sherlock walks outside, John shivered slightly as the cold hit him.  
“Come on, we’re walking this way John,”  
“Yep, lead the way,” John sounded far from happy to be out in the cold. Sherlock knew his body won’t be able to stand it for long but he needed a change in scenery, they both did. Sherlock led them into the park. The whole area was covered in snow, looking like a clean blanket covering the place. Makes a change from all of the rubbish that normally covered the paths and grass.  
“…I forgot how nice this place looked…” John admitted quietly.  
“It hasn’t really changed that much,”  
“No not really,” john buried himself deeper into his jacket.  
“Cold?”   
“I’ll survive,” Sherlock looked to john whilst he looked around. He wanted to ask so many questions about why John had destroyed his life. He sighed.  
“John. Why?”  
“”Hmm?” John looked to the detective a little confused.  
“Why did you do this to yourself? The drugs, the attempted suicide, my fall was to save your life and you just wanted to throw it away,”  
“So that’s why you brought me out here? To moan? To have a go at me?” john now looked annoyed at this point.  
“Yes actually, you still had a life after the fall, your whole life was still ahead of you and you threw it away,”  
“Because my best friend died! You didn’t even tell me you were alive!”  
“I wanted to keep you safe John! I wanted to come back, I really did!” his voice sounded desperate. “I didn’t miss my violin or the cases or whatever else, I missed your company! I missed you!”  
“Funny way of showing you wanted me around!” Sherlock held his shoulders .  
“Listen to me! Moriarty had a sniper aimed at your head! If I didn’t jump you would have died for real! You couldn’t come back to life! I would have lost you and it would have been my fault! Your life is so much more important than mine!”  
“You still should have told me!” John started looking upset and eventually lowered his head.  
“I know I should have but Moriaty’s men were still watching you. I wanted to let you know I was still alive believe me I really did, but I didn’t want to risk you getting hurt John. I was scared I was going to lose you. Not scared, terrified even, I ….you’re my closet friend,”  
“You have a funny way of saying I want you to have a good life by scaring you with a memory of myself falling,”  
“John please don’t act stupid because you’re not,” Sherlock still had his hands on John shoulders, he just didn’t want to move them, being close to John was comforting, he didn’t want to be alone, he wanted ‘his’ John back. ‘Just tell him the truth,’ he thought to himself. “You’re-you’re smart, look at you, you’re a detective now, you didn’t listen to me, you carried on saying how good I was at my Job that I wasn’t a fraud, you believed in me still. You pretty much tried to step into my shoes and for that, I’m truly grateful and proud of you. When you came back from Afghanistan you were suffering but you tried to get on with your life the best you can, you then ended up meeting me. A huge ‘stuck up jerk’ and a ‘freak’ Consulting Detective know as Sherlock Holmes,” John couldn’t help but smile at Sherlock insulting himself and looked up to him.   
“You’re neither a freak nor a jerk Sherlock. You’ve change, for the better,”  
“I have?”  
“Yeah, you seem more…emotional,”  
“John…that’s not a good thing when it involves me,”  
“It can be Sherlock and most of the time it is,”  
“Yes they, they make people lose control, become chaotic,”  
“Well that’s not true, emotions help people get on with their lives,”  
“But can also end lives. I almost revealed myself to you because you were in bad shape, which would have been a very bad thing,” Johns smile faded.  
“Thanks. Thanks for that, you’re basically saying you don’t like caring for someone else, you don’t like having friends, thanks,” John moved out of Sherlocks hold and stepped backwards. “And here I am thinking you’ve change, I really am an idiot,” Sherlock frowned.  
“No I didn’t mean it like that John,”  
“You’re a bad liar,”  
“John I’m telling you the truth, I don’t know how to control them, I’ve never felt like this before,” Sherlock almost panicked seeing John leave and grabbed his arm, turning him around quickly.  
“Let g!-“ Sherlock had pulled john towards him, holding him close and crushed his lips against the doctors.

Sherlock knew. He knew it as soon as his lips touched John that this was the stupidest thing he’d ever done. John pushed back, forcing their lips apart, and the thought of punching Sherlock in the face race through his mind.  
“Why did you bloody do that!?”  
“Because I wanted to,” Sherlock said dead serious and a little out of breath.  
“And you think that it would make a difference!?”  
“Yes,”  
“Why? Nothing was gained from it,”  
“You’re wrong,”  
“Enlighten me,”  
“Because, I’ve been wanting to do that for, two years, one month, two weeks, five days and seventeen hours. It’s the only thing that has kept me alive and sane,” John became silent, staring at the detective. He didn’t have to think twice to know what that specific time was long ago. Sherlock had wanted to kiss him? Bu John couldn’t believe that, Sherlock Holmes doesn’t do relationships.  
“John, believe me,”  
“Believe you? How can I do that?” Sherlock sighed and stepped forwards towards his doctor.  
“Look at you. You’ve become this because of me. You could have gotten on with your life but you didn’t. You waited. You waited and waited and waited. You have bags under your eyes, you look like drugs have been coursing through your veins for years. You should have just forgotten about me John, you should have met a someone and lived happily with them or something, your life could have been so much better if you had just left me as a dead person,” Sherlock hesitated when he went to move his hand. He was shaking. Why was he shaking? Was he scared? If so why was he scared? Did he really want John to forget him? He moved his hand again taking Johns lightly, a form of comfort came from it. “Why didn’t you forget about me john?” Sherlock spoke no louder than a whisper, then there was silence between them, pure torturous silence.  
“…I didn’t want to forget you Sherlock, I wanted you to stay in my life,” Sherlock sighed happily. “But then you died…and my feelings died with you….” John pulled his hand away from Sherlocks.  
“No john, please don’t do this,”  
“Do what? Blank you? Leave you alone, hide every emotion I ever had for you because, I think you’ll find you’ve done that to me for years now, you finally say something, it’s just two years too late,” john turned around walking away. For a few seconds, Sherlock saw himself in John. The one person he never wanted John to be. He grabbed the doctors arm turning him around.  
“Don’t. You. Dare. Turn into me John. Don’t hide, don’t lock your feelings away. As soon as you do that, you stop being the John I know. Hate me, leave me, never talk to me again, but please never turn into me. I want to see, I want to know how you feel about me, I want to know how you felt two years ago,” Sherlock looked into Johns eyes waiting for an answer. But he didn’t get one. They just stared at each other. “John…I love you alright? There I said it, what more do you want? Don’t be an emotionless idiot now,” John smiled a little at the comment of Sherlock insulting himself before becoming serious again. He knew what he wanted, he was just so angry because Sherlock left him. He was so focused on the anger he forgot how much he cared for the detective. Sherlock Holmes. The detective he had come to love all those years ago was back, alive. It was like a revelation, like Johns mind had finally accepted he was back, johns face softened and he stepped closer to Sherlock, leaning up and kissing him desperately and Sherlock smiled.  
“My john’s back,” they kissed again. The need to explore each others mouths increased, tongues danced across one another, hands gripped onto clothing. The coldness of Christmas left their bodies.  
“I came back to London because of you John,” Sherlock said as they parted for air. John smiled looking up seeing the snow fill with snow. It was a steady fall, and heavy enough to settle on the floor, and Sherlocks curls. The doctors smile grew seeing black curls eventually turn white.  
“What?” Sherlock questioned.  
“Nothing, nothing,” a calm silence fell between them as they watched the snow fall together, it’s only at this point did john realize how cold he really was and shivered.  
“Cold?”  
“No, I’m fine,”  
“You shivered, we need to raise your body temperature slightly,”  
“Walking back to the flat?”  
“too boring,”  
“Well then, what do you suggest we do then?”  
“Hmm…I’ve got it. Take my hand john,”  
“What? Um okay then,” the doctor takes Sherlocks hand and he feels himself being pulled towards the detective. He was about to complain before he felt an arm go across his waist. John stared at him for a while before they started moving in small circles. They were dancing. John couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculously strange and hilarious, in Johns eyes, was about the situation they were in. the circle gradually grew the more they danced, soon they were laughing together. They danced for a good ten minutes before johns body was begging for a moment to stop.  
“Warm?” Sherlock said slightly out of breath.  
“Yeah…” Sherlock watched john get his breath back before kissing him passionately as the snow fell harder onto them both.  
“I believe we should head home,” the doctor nodded and stood close next to the detective as they walked home together hand in hand. The journey home was short and sweet, the heat of the central heating hit Johns cheeks making them itch slightly as they made their way up to their flat. John shook the cold, and some snow, away. Sherlock walked up behind him, kissing and nipping at his neck. “You’re making my feelings hard to control Doctor Watson,” John smiled and turned to face the man he loved.  
“How does it feel to not be in control?”  
“Fantastic,” Sherlock moved his head down a little kissing John desperately pinning him against the wall.  
“Sherlock, you seem-”  
“Out of control, un reasonable, impatient?” Sherlock replied quickly.  
“Yes all of those things,”  
“Do you like me being like this?”   
“Oh God yes,” Sherlock grinned and kissed John for the second time in the space of thirty seconds. John moved so the detectives back hit the wall and moved his body flat against Sherlocks. Both moaned as their clothed arousals crushed against each other. He set about removing the detectives iconic coat and scarf making them pool to the floor. Whilst john felt his jacket being removed.  
“John are we-“  
“yes,”  
“Bed?”  
“Too far,” John looked to the side and saw the sofa. Perfect. He practically threw the detective onto the sofa, straddled him and attacked his neck with bites and kisses. Sherlock had now become unbearably hard, he hadn't felt like this in a long time. But now john had become a little impatient and started undoing the detectives shirt. Once it laid on the floor, the doctor got the same treatment, but he didn't stop with just removing the shirt and jumper, Sherlocks hands went down to Johns zip and lowered them enough so john could kick them off. It had turned into a game of who could strip the other person the quickest. It didn’t take them long to both be naked and staring at each other once more. They shared another passionate kiss as Sherlocks hands moved down to Johns arse cheek, pushing him down, their arousals touched and the flat fell silent. Mouths hung open as words couldn’t reach them.  
“Please move, please move now,” Sherlock stuttered and held John. John nodded and slowly grinded their erections together.  
“John…oh God…” Sherlock bucked making the friction between them increase and the doctor mouthed ‘fuck’ to himself. This made the speed in increase more, grinding against the detective harder and faster, sparks of pleasure went through them as their temperatures rose. John moved his hand between them, forcing their erections closer together as they grinded against each other.  
“Fucking hell John,” Sherlock panted, he hadn’t done anything this sexual in a long time so in truth he couldn’t hold it for long. “John, I’m so close…” Sherlock bucked as pre come leaked from his member.  
“I know, I can feel that you are,” the doctor replied breathlessly and his own pre come leaked from his erection. “Fuck, oh God Sherlock come for me,”  
“John! Oh GOD!” Sherlock bucked one last time and climaxed heavily over John and himself. The doctor followed a few seconds later, and they were soon covered in a mixture of each other’s release. Gasping followed shortly after as they rode out their orgasms together before John slumped onto of Sherlock, breathing heavily. They both laid there in silence getting air back into their lungs.  
“…Wow…” John finally spoke.  
“Uh-Huh,” Sherlock replied wrapping his arms around the doctor almost protectively.  
“…Merry Christmas John…” they both laughed.  
“Merry Christmas Sherlock,”


End file.
